feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
pop tarts are not kleenex
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
Randomize
