I just crawled out of a second story window using a sheet and his clothes for a rope so he wouldn't wake up.
I am so glad I watched Macgyver as a kid.
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
I told him I would only take his calls if he was dead, dying, capturing a midget, or buying me shots.
I stand by my new policy.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
I just want you to know that watching you throw up out of a cab in the McDonald's drive thru was probably the highlight of my night.
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
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