In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
and she was petting her beer can
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
I found this letter on my leg this morning "dear sober self- we are one body now. It's weird but get used to it because it already happened" who the fuck is lionman?
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
Randomize
