Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
After you bought Jesus' name tag off him at the Mexican restaurant you commenced to stumbling around the lobby showing anybody who would listen what would Jesus do.
Stop giving me tequila.
Shitshow foam night was such a success
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
You're the only person I know who can be puking into a trash can at 8 in the morning in Manhattan and get a date out of it....
Hooray! My email address wasn't leaked by Ashley Madison!
I will chop off your penis
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
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