She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
She's not a foreskin expert like you
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
Apparent my drunk ass was so dedicated to taking a piss, when I walked across the dance floor to get to the bathroom a 9/10 broad tried to dance with me and I just pushed her aside, like hard enough to send her a few feet from where she was standing, pointed at her and said "Not now chief, gotta rock a mean one."
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