i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
in hindsight, drinking 2 bottles of wine probably wasnt going to put me in an optimal position for a job interview
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
I five year old is judging me because I just opened a bottle of Sam Adams with my teeth before 8am
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
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