if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
the liver wants what the liver wants
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
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