She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
Randomize
