so i was sitting on this guys lap, and we were flirting and everything right..well his phone kept ringing, turns out it was his pregnant wife...she had gone into labor..
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
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