hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
Dude, this is like the 4th time today I've had to use cruise control for a 25mph zone. This hangover is never fucking gonna end.
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
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