it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
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