He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
You called yourself Captain Aspirin and then tried to cure my headache by shoving pills up my nose. Fuck you becoming a nurse, you can't take care of me while you're drunk ever again. Ever.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
I said:" get your jacket, get your beer and get the fuck out of here"
Firing someone with a rhyme is the new high point in my life.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
You sent me snap chats of you guys having sex. Like plural. It was like flip book porn, I'm traumatized.
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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