We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
I just want to let you know it was a unanimous decision that we would eat you first if we ever turned into cannibals, we figured with all the bacon you eat you may taste like it. It's a chance we are willing to take with your life...don't forget that we love you
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
Great night. I'm in the middle of explaining to her how the stock market works and she just rips my pants off and starts blowing me. Nerdiest blowjob ever.
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
Yo, I can't just ask my mom where she relocated my vibrator to, can I?
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
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