Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
I molested 6 butterflies tonight
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
Randomize
