doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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