well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
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