If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
It doesn't matter if it's only been 3 days since you last changed your sheets. If your fuck buddy comments on how your bed smells like sex, it's time to change them again.
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