I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
Crazy homeless man drinking beer out of a vitamin water container on the bus just set me up on a date with the yuppie next to him
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