She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
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