Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
Randomize
