who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was around the time I started requesting "big girl straws" from the bartender for my jack and diets, that I knew I'd probably wake up with my sunglasses on and find my wallet in the shower.
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
Randomize