i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
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