I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
I want to miss work tomorrow on account of violent projective vomit... Make it happen
You just stood up, raised your glass and said, "I'd like to thank the academy" then fell through a glass table. THAT'S why we cut you off.
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
Awkward drunk fist bump with the boss. Not sure if tomorrow will be weird or wonderful.
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
Randomize
