well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
Turns out your granddad is cooler than you. We're taking him on our New year's eve pub crawl instead. Sorry.
Randomize
