Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
Randomize
