he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
your mom just called me and asked me why i'm not in jail with you right now.
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
Clearly you need to take sleeping pills and put your phone in the toilet
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize
