Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
My fucking roommate unpluged my alarm; I pissed on his clean clothes.
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
The two girls sitting next to me are asking siri "Like, uh, how do you know my name?". Do I fuck with them or fuck them?
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
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