I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
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