he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
I knew you were super hungover. But so hungover you fire our house cleaner because her vacuums too loud is excessive
I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Randomize
