I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
Im in a bar and I just invented a scrabble drinking game. People are cheering. It's like the universe has aligned itself.
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
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