Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
Randomize
