...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
I literally recorded a toilet flushing to make it his ringtone to remind me what a piece of shit he is
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
Carson kissed me on my cold sore before I could stop him so I think I gave my kid herpes. Mom of the year. Just call me MOTY.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
