for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
Looking through last night's sexting, realized one is a haiku..
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
Randomize