He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
My idiot ex texted me on Valentine's day to tell me I was right, he did need a therapist.
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
Randomize
