I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
Psh a bachelors degree is the new adulthood. We're all just pretending anyways. I'm sitting on my boyfriends couch while he's passed out drunk. In my lap. On a Wednesday. And he's a nurse. See, pretending to be an adult
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
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