9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
One of the finest moments in my life was when I was puking in between my legs as I was shitting, and thought to myself "hmm this shall be called shomiting."
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
