yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
The bouncer just called me magically delicious... apparently I'm a lucky charm. hollllleeeerrrr!
Randomize