I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
This was my thought process as I drunkenly ran home: Whoa! I'm going so FAST! Why don't I run EVERYWHERE! ALL THE TIME! Then I peed in a bush and passed out on the ground.
So basically you were a dog.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
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