It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
He asked if I wanted to blow his flute? Please call me and pretend there is a family emergency!!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Downstairs neighbor just asked me to tell people when they jump off the balcony next time not to land on her flowers
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Using a miniature baseball bat to kill a mosquito in the house may not have been the most efficient or safest way, but that thing is fucking dead. However, so are three wine glasses, a lamp, and my baseball bat privileges. Worth it.
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
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