i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
She just opened a six pack of corona with her car door ... I had no idea she was such a skilled drunk
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
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