i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
I just tried to pass the bowl to my dog for 2 minutes before I remembered she isn't human. It is 7:27 am.
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
Randomize
