There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
My mom just walked in on me naked taking a shit and packing a bowl...the only comment she makes is, she wants her Tupperware back after my pot's out of it. Best mom ever.
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
You're a hot mess, you know that?
At least I'm a FUN hot mess. Like a train crash full of pizza, fireworks and glitter.
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
Randomize