i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
My vag should have a twitter account. It would be like "destroyed another condom today".
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
Randomize
