Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
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And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
Did we literally take a cab across the street
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
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