I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
First Thanksgiving as a grown up: My step dad had to take my brother (who still smells like booze) and I both to our cars this morning, apparently we were at the same bars (same stamps), & I think I broke my elbow. Im thankful to be alive & not incarcerated.
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
Randomize
