what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
Spent 30 minutes in the board meeting trying to figure out where the foul smell was coming from. Thought it was the guy's feet sitting next to me. Then i uncrossed my legs. Turns out it was my vagina. Thank goodness for travel size febreeeze.
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
I legit just said "vaginal access denied" then told him his password hint was "tequila shots"
Next person that gets my dog drunk is paying to have my carpet cleaned. I am tired of getting up to pee and stepping in dog barf.
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
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