what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
If I come in tomorrow with a cane and a seeing eye dog it's because I just mixed up my salicylic acid acne stuff with my eye makeup remover
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
Randomize
