Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
You stole my car to go to your boyfriends. Now your parents are fucking in the next room at top volume, and I have no way to escape..thought you should know that the amount of therapy I'll be needing for this is expensive.
You're the best friend ever.
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
When I planned out my evening, "co-author lesbian vampire erotica" was not anywhere on my list of expected activities.
Me neither, but hey, this is where we've ended up. Let's embrace the moment.
Randomize
