Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
Randomize
