Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
It's okay I missed my booty call by two whole minutes so I decided to delete him from my phone and then re-add him as "I am a douchelord"
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
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