You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
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