Life lesson: when driving and throwing up, choose a paper bag over plastic. Fuck my life.
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
tequila makes me forget i have legs
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
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